I think my biggest fear is someone telling me they hate my work. That fear has been an obstacle in me branching out and putting my art out in a public setting. I'm slowing learning that this mindset is setting me up for failure.
I've read books and articles on Imposter Syndrome and learning to be more fearless with my commitment to my work. I've spent hours studying paint colors and brushstrokes color mixing and all things art related, but I haven't spent time on marketing myself and building my own mindset when it comes to my creative pursuits. To my own detriment I've stymied my own progress.
I've created this problem all on my own and only I can fix it. That being said I've become engulfed in my own head, instead following my own advice and practices to be open and positive. Sylvia Plath said "the worst enemy to creativity is self doubt." Such a resonating statement for me...
I've become my own worst enemy.
So what to do? This is the question that keeps me up at night. The solution is simple but not easily followed. I have to get out my head and trust the process and let all that negative thinking evaporate from my thoughts.
As I keep painting everyday no matter how awful it appears, I painted anyway. I have to quell those negative thoughts. As Van Gogh so eloquently stated, "if you hear a voice telling you cannot paint, paint anyway and that voice will be silenced."
I'm an artist, I painted today and I silenced my self doubt until tomorrow. When tomorrow comes I'll still paint more and keep that self doubting dialogue silenced.
